SWARTHOS

Well well well hell, so said my junior high school colleague. I don’t think they call it junior high anymore, right? I think it’s middle school. It was back in middle school. Someone signed my yearbook “well well well hell” I can’t remember what the rest of it was, but it made an impression on my 13 year old self. That and “Be kind to animals, kiss a monkeys ass”. 

Anyway that was a big digression now I just want to make an entry about how crappy my day has been.

First of all my dog pulled a muscle while playing a game of fetch this morning. He’s OK, I massaged it out of him and let him sit in front of a warm heater and relax. He’s doing pretty good now but I don’t like it when he’s hurt because we spend so much time together and we enjoy our outings together immensely.

Now the company I work for wants to sell a bit of property we’ve had for 20 years, but they don’t want to do it themselves. They want me to represent the company and sell the property and I don’t know a damn thing about it. I don’t care about selling the property, I’m no realtor. So I’m told to call this fella who wants to make an offer on it. 

And so I do and he doesn’t answer so I speak to the machine and leave him a message, and since I don’t have a great vocabulary for selling property, I basically said something to the tune of “we want $360,000 thousand dollars, it’s not negotiable and if you…” and then I didn’t know what to say I just left it like that I said it again, and if you… and so then I repeated the price, it’s $360,000 dollars and I hung up.  At that point I probably should have held the phone to my ass and farted.

That’s how my day went, can I get a right on?  Now I have a really bad case of gas and some heartburn and the company dinner is tomorrow night and I don’t think I’m gonna make it. I don’t even want to go!  I wanna sit home drink beer and wine get drunk and watch the Big Lebowski – out.