SWARTHOS

Well, what a night it’s been. I got hit with a good ol’ fashioned tinnitus flare-up in my right ear after what can only be described as a stroke-level amount of alcohol consumption.

Lying here in bed, I’m not feeling too hot – the familiar neon blue glow on the wall is a clear reminder of the trouble I’m in – but I’d do the same again in a heartbeat if I could.

My ear is still ringing in pain while my eyes are sandpaper dry. But the ride stands again tomorrow, and I must be prepared to take it as come – with or without my ear.

I’ve passed the level of impulse control and found myself on the brink of the unforeseen. I’ll take the punishment and suffer the next day – that’s a givin.

So now I take a deep breath knowing I’ll right the situation tomorrow, swallow a couple of sleeping pills, and hope that God will guide me through.

I’m here because I love it, and I love it because it’s what I know, and I know enough to know that I should slow down and start taking my time.

Yet here I am, yet another night, wide awake hoping to see another sun rise. But with each passing day, I realize how much I can take.

My mission now is to find the line between loving life and not losing yourself in it. That’s a hard one, but that’s where I’m at – and I know deep down it’s all gonna be alright.

I may have gone a bit too far, but that’s all part of the fun. It’s a juicy little paradox that I’m in love with, and I’m here to stay.

So, until next time, cheers to pushing the limit and the humbling beauty of the consequences.